Sunday, July 19, 2015

Let’s start with an apology in advance to all my friends who ride bicycles.  This is gonna hurt a little. Unless you have thick skin, you may want to stop reading here and go look at some pretty pictures of Bryce Canyon or Lake Powell.

Bicycles have no place on public roads. You are a hazard to me and I am a huge hazard to you! I can’t  tell you how many bicyclists that I almost killed on this trip.  These sadistic exercise freaks always seem to pick the narrowest and busiest roads to practice their craft. I would like to move over for you, but when a semi is headed toward me in the oncoming lane, I have no choice but to buzz your backside at 60 MPH.  This always results in an obscene finger gesture in my direction as the guy climbs back on his bike from the woods.

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Sorry dude, but the road ain’t big enough for the two of us.  Here is a little advice. There are these places called gyms where one can exercise. Heck, I have even heard of people who exercise at home.  I have friends who tell me that push ups and sit ups are good exercise and I don’t think that those need to be done on a public roadway. I however do not doubt that most bicyclists would argue their constitutional right to do crunches on the double yellow line. What is wrong with you people?  If you are into it for the scenery and the open air feeling, than buy a damn motorcycle. If you really are attached to your bike then ride it in your own driveway like the rest of the kids.  When Donald Trump becomes president, I am going to ask him to make bike riding illegal for anyone over 13.  I am sure he would agree that “those people” need to be taught a lesson.  Their bikes would be recycled and turned into nice new cars that actually belong on the road.  They would also have to donate those cute little spandex suits to Europe where they would be recycled into more Speedos for fat middle age Germans.  So to all you Lance Armstrong wannabes……Go enter the tour de France and stay the hell of my roads! Since my dry humor does not always translate, I am of course joking around.  Although it is true that I secretly fantasize about beating you all to death with those stupid clown shoes that you all wear.

Now that I have that off my chest, I would like to take a few minutes to reflect on our trip.  Right before we left, Hunter graduated High School. I could not be more proud of him. Not only did he graduate a year early, but he also earned 30 college credits over the past 3 years which means that he will be entering college as a Sophomore!  Next month he starts school at my Alma Mater SUNY Stony Brook where he will be going for pre-med.

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I am sure that this is going to have an effect on his ability to travel with us in the future, but we are going to try to keep this going as long as he is able to pull it off and is willing to share his time with us.  At 13 Colby is still into camping and we are thankful for that. Three weeks on the road in close quarters is enough to test any families bond, but I am happy to report that the bickering was minimal and everyone really enjoyed themselves.  Our standard poodle Ember is always a great traveling companion. She has been our camping buddy since day one. She loves that outdoors as much as we do.

So many friends and family tell me that they have a cross country trip on their bucket list. To this I say ……Rip up your bucket list and make a five year plan.  With five years of planning, anything is possible. A Bucket List is just too vague and lofty which often results in many unchecked items. With a five year plan, you start making concrete moves to make your dreams a reality. Our first cross country trip was 5 years in the making and required a lot of steps to make it a reality. Of course it was well worth the wait and we have been operating under the 5 year rule ever since.  Life is short people, if you want it bad enough make a plan and do it! You will be glad that you did.

Happy Trails

The Goldsmiths.